Our Christmas Angles

This year my family had the best Christmas ever. I feel that my kids had truly felt the meaning of Christmas, and we were rewarded for it.

It started off with Christmas eve (which is when I celebrate Christmas with the kids) I normally cook all day and then have all my family over for dinner. We listen to Christmas music all day and after dinner we open presents. This year was very similar in the schedule, which helped alot for my child who has a thing for continuity. We has a big difference in the location, we held dinner at our church. It was so wonderful to spent the day at church, we were given the privilege of cooking for any one who wanted to join us, and then taking dinners to the local "camp" for the homeless. This was the best part. My children were able to join a few to take meals to the homeless in our little community. This was a great learning experience for them. They were able to reach out and help some who needed the help. So cool! We stayed for the candle light service, then visited for quite awhile with our family. I saw some "family" who I hadn't seen in years. the girls were even enjoying it, not whining that they wanted to go home and open presents, that wasn't their focus. I felt that we had truly taught them the real meaning of Christmas. We were on our way home and Josie shared how much fun she had and she was happy we wanted to do this next year. That really surprised me, for she is the more judgemental of the two and she was very resistant of the two. This made me proud. We got home a bit before my dad so the girls started to clean up the wrapping debris with out asking and rearranged the furniture to better able accommodate our growing family. The opening of presents went off with out a hitch. It was so sweet to see the thoughtful gifts that both girls had picked out for each other and family members. They have really learned that when shopping for someone else think of what they would want and not what they want the other person to have. This seems to be a trait that many of my family might not have mastered, but I feel that they really have. This too made me get a bit teary eyed.


Christmas morning comes and the girls slept in and then they brought me their stockings so they could open them up with out me having to get up. I thought that was nice of them. We headed off to their other grandparents and that was a pure delight too. No snapping, put downs yelling or other traditional bad endings. It really was wonderful.

I have spent many Christmases in tears, and I never cried for hurting only tears of joy. I feel that we were truly blessed this season because we blessed others. So my question is this what have you done to bless others?

Bittersweet

After closing our boutique, I did a complete change of careers and started to do in home health care. I have started caring for a couple in their late 80's. I loved it! He was just pure sunshine and she was very grouchy. Some days she would keep telling me to go home she didn't need me, but when she asked me to help, or we would do something together it was just heaven.

Last night was my last shift working with them. Their health has deteriorated and they now need 24 hour nursing care, so they are moving into an assisted living facility. This is sad for me because I will miss them terribly. I am comforted that they will be getting the care they need, because in the last month that I had been with them I had started feeling inadequate to provide some of their care. So this is a bittersweet ending. l will miss working with them, but I know they will be getting the care they need. That made loosing them as a client a bit better.

Yesterday I processed 10 pumpkins into puree, and roasted seeds. Today I found a Sim card laying tossed on my desk. I put it into my computer to see what it was. It was a full card with many adventures on it, one of it being when I took my niece and nephew to the pumpkin patch to get the pumpkins from yesterday. It was a fun afternoon. Check it out for yourself.

I just Love trees with leaves.

Many of the trees in the area are evergreens, so I go out of my way to find trees that have falling leaves. Goofy I know, but it is a thing with me.

Here is the the modern day buggy & driver.

You don't see it, but this was taken from the hay ride. The kids had so much fun.

They went on it three different times that day.

Truth be known, I loved it too. Sitting down meant not running around.

You get what I am saying?

SHHHHH

Wonder what is going on here?

UMMM, I don't know if I like the looks of this.

Look at my little boy, and his new friend.
His mom kept trying to get him down but he wanted into the picture.

Wonder what he sees?

Dom is just lovin the camera!

Such deep thoughts, or serious plotting.

Dreams of Carmel apples are dancing in her head.

I Just love how well my camera and him got alond this day.

Waiting for the hay ride to start.

Don't they look sweet?

Looks are definitely deceiving.

My goofy grins!

I am thinking about making a collage for Christmas.

Which ones are your favorite?

Hosting

Warning:

It seems that no matter how many different ways I write my post and upload the pics. I still have not learned how to get the pics. and post in the order that I want.

So the pictures are in opposite order and my post is last.

Have fun reading!

After the concert we took our kids, and my "taxi" kids to our local

Golden arches for their first Mac Donald's in the U.S.

So much fun!

Our two exchange girls, Laura, Sarah, and Josie after the concert.

( both choirs singing together)

This past week the local High School choir hosted a choir from Australia.

We were one of the few families who were lucky enough to have 2 girls stay with us.

(Well not actually us, my house is FULL but my in laws have a spare room with two empty beds)

It was one of the BEST experiences EVER!

The girls were so polite.

Listening to them talk, was just lovely.

Hearing them perform, so amazing.

I was also the "taxi mom" to two other boys.

They were a lot of fun too!

They did teach me many things.

The most important was ......

ALL teens forget!

For a long time I was under the belief that I messed my kids up.

I had some how not taught them the art of bringing your stuff with you.

Then I noticed other moms bringing forgotten items.

It it a national epidemic?

I started to believe that we were doing something wrong.

But...It is not me or our nation.

It is a global problem.

I think it has been diagnosed as adolescents.

The day of the concert 5 of the 6 kids I drove forgot their things.

And guess who remembered all of her stuff?

Josie.

Did you ever think that would happen?

Nope not me either.

If you are ever approached to host anyone please do it.

This experience was wonderful and the girls made new face book friends.

I Loved that no matter how different the cultures were they found common ground, For them it was music. They found common music and filled the car with their singing. Harmonies, and giggles were the radio this week.

Now if you have ever sat in a car with Josie you know she sings.

I also have the pleasure to transport Shasta, who also sings.

So to say that my car gets a little loud sometimes is an understatement.

But with 6 singers in the car I was able to sing along and no one knew,

no one could hear me.

So Much FUN!

Today

Today is the last day that we are open for business.

I know this is what is needed for me my children and my family,

but that dose not make things any easier.

I feel like this is just another thing to add to the ever growing list of my failures.

I have been trying to focus on the process, not the actual ending.

But today I can not do it.

We are closed. The End.

I know this is my choice, and I know we needed it. but it hurts so much.

I can't even begin to cry, I would just break down and I am not sure if I would stop.

I just can't start.

So I need to go do my hair and put on my makeup,

hoping that those small comforts will hold me together today.

Butterfly Boutique will be open today for the last time from 10-5.

If you are in the area please stop by say Hi and pick up some really good deals.

All recycled clothing is $1. So just swing by and get some really good deals!

Gotta go get to work.

I got pics....

I don't know how busy your life's have been but ours have been crazy.

Our family is going though lots of changes.

Some good, and some are just making life different.

This causes lots of stress, and for Brianna to have melt downs.

She had been doing so well with learning to control it recently,

but with many things changing the slightest thing seems to set her off.

This makes life interesting!

With all of the special needs of Nathaniel, and focusing on him,

I sometimes forget that Brianna has a few slight issues too.

I know Nathaniel has an amazing mom, and it is not my place to raise him,

but I have a habit of placing his needs ahead of my kids.

This is all me and my fault.

In the back of my mind I justify it like this...

The girls are older

I will just help for a little while then I will help the girls.

He has to have XYZ

If I don't help, who will?

None of this is good. It is all my doing. Truth be known I love to help.

I just don't always know when It is too much for me or the girls.

So now we are in a place where home is in chaos, routines gone and I have no idea what our day will look in a short while.

This all causes melt downs in our world.

So I am trying to teach Bri my technique on how to avoid being overwhelmed,

I will share it with you.

The other day we actually made it home before dark

and look what we found going up the street to my house?

Just looking at them bounding away makes me feel like they are taking my troubles with them.

I love nature and often feel like the lord has provided us with wonderful tools to take our troubles to him.

For me I feel him when I am breathing in and out with the waves, watching the deer bounce away, feeling the wind on my face while swinging, watching a butterfly fly away....

These all take away my troubles and let me see HIM.

How do you see HIM?

Manners and Rudeness....

I really dislike harping on bad things and try to ignore negativity. Not always an easy thing to do, but I feel the urge to post something not so nice about people and their tendency to be so self absorbed and rude to others.

This past two weeks we have been very busy at the county fair. My children, nieces and nephews like to get involved and participate in various thing around the grounds.

My nephew Nathaniel has a disability which has him in a wheelchair during these long hot days. The fair grounds has handicap accessibility, but to be honest, not always the easiest to use. So we have a favorite bathroom. Getting to the bathroom is a maze, but the stall is very nice. So why do we have to wait for the only stall that we can use when there is many (about 6) open? Because a skinny teen wanted to use that one. I can understand that some tines it is needed to use the handicap stall, but it was not necessary. I know this happened to me and my sister almost every time. So frustrated.

Nathaniel likes to watch. He will just sit in his chair and watch the show, auction, pigs, or really almost anything that caught his attention. We know that walkways were put so people can walk safely from point a to point b. So we park Nathaniel out of the path in a safe place. So it really upsets me, well really pisses me off, that the general public feels the right to stop in front of the handicap and stand their to watch. There are bleachers that you are able to walk up and sit down, so why can't they? Because it is easier to be so self absorbed that they do not pay attention to where the are, so they do not know that they are blocking a person from enjoying the activity. Yesterday it got so bad that we had to wheel him into a pen to keep the public from blocking him so he could watch his sister and cousin show the pigs. All it would need is for people to know where they are and who or what is around them for this to be prevented. But it seem that is too much to ask.

Last night was the last day of the fair, and Dominick (another nephew) qualified to a championship round of mutton bustin (like bull riding but on sheep) This is a really cool group of people, and we had been their for many of the show and got kinda known. (Audrey and Caitlyn two other nieces conned the lamb so they were very memorable). So Josie thought she would ask if she could sing the national anthem live. Every show they would play a recording and she thought it would be cool if she could do it. No harm in asking, right? Well she did ask and was given a go ahead. This would be her first time singing the national anthem solo for a crowd. We were so exited. But some of my family became to tired, and had to go home, couldn't blame them for I wanted to go home, but even thou my video camera broke earlier in the day I still had my digital camera which takes video so I could still record it for those who couldn't see them. Or I thought I could. Josie was singing, I was filling up with pride, for her and our country when the "gentleman" next to me proceeded to take out his camera lean in front of me to get a better view. It was so hard to hold my tong! I didn't want it recorded what I wanted to say, so I just tried to shove him out of the way. No luck, song ends and I proceed to tell him thank you for giving me the perfect view of him and his camera, he was all... no problem it hasn't started yet, he would move some. That was his answer, I let him know that it did start and I was recording my daughters first time singing the national anthem solo in public. He told me it didn't matter I didn't miss the real show. UGGGGG!!! I wanted to scream. I knew I was wrong for shoving, well to be honest basically hitting him(he didn't even move) but he had no clue how his self-centeredness affects others.

I know that we all get caught up in the moment, and sometimes forget ourselves, but for it to have happened so constantly It makes me believe that it was not just a momentarily slip, but a constant place of rudeness. I feel bad for thinking it but their were far more rudeness going on than politeness. This disturbs me! In the past few weeks both of my children have been verbally assaulted by adults. Not adults seeing them doing wrong and trying to correct it, but yelled at and called names for things that were not their doing and out of their control. That an innocent child goes try to hug a relative that had not been seen in the last year only to be kicked away like a ball is wrong. I know that parents teach their children, but it is the persons choice to on what to use as he or she grows up. I do not know if any of these people were taught manners, but I do know that by this stage in their life the did have the choice to learn some and they chose to learn rudeness. This really hurts and upsets me!
I know that their is alot of polite well mannered people out there, but after the last two weeks I have just had my fill of rudeness!

RUMMAGE SALE!!!!!!!!!

Hey everyone. Tomorrow we are having a rummage sale at butterfly boutique. And there are going to be some really cool items that we have worked hard on.... Like we will have a 4 piece chair set that are completely refinished. they have leather backs and made of wood. So it would be great if you all came out and supported us... Thanks.
Dancing away Josie

SOO Frustrated!!!

Now I know that I don't post very often, but I spent a lot of time last week editing all the pictures that had been riding around on my memory card.
Boy some of them were old!
I had many cute post forming in my mind.
One of them was about what I learned by editing the pic. it was something that had been right in front of me but I didn't see until I saw the pic.
But FRED (the computer) decided it was hot out and time for a vacation. It needs a new fan, but until we get it a new one it is holding all of my pictures hostage! So no more end of the school year pic. Josie and Brianna's birthdays and 4th of July. Not to mention many others! I know they are all in there. Once we get a new fan install it and boot it up I will be able to post pictures, but until then the COMPUTER has my pictures!
So my question too all of you... How do you store your digital pictures?

In only 1 hour...

Goodness Life has been so busy that I started this post but forgot a few things. So here I am to try to finish it up.

It was Josie's 8th grade party. I only had a little bit of time (one hour) to do the mommy thing.

I get distracted easily... I know shocker. So I normally can juggle multiply jobs at once better than hunkering down and focusing on one thing.

One hour befor the party was to start I pull up to a frantic Josie worried that she would be just done up normal or really late. Oh child of mine with little faith. She doubted the training that I have recived due to her dancing to turn her into the Princess she wanted.

So in one hour....

Set her hair

French manicure, and glittered pedicure

Special make up

and take out the hair set and style it.

Whoo, that was alot but very possible.

The hot curlers were already hot,

she had already showered and cut/filed her nails

and the dress had been hung up in the bathroom durring the shower so no pressing!

Dear child of mine do not fear for mommy is here.

We are back!!!

We have had a very busy time lately and I just needed a break and to spend time living. I have spent time with my family and by focusing more on them we are coming to grips with some big changes. My girls have blossomed into two very independent young women and for the most part they are becoming best friends willingly. It is a true blessing to watch.

Brianna is growing up real fast, a few weeks ago she spent a week at the 4 year collage she wants to go to, and it confirmed her plans. Such a big step. She has been pulling away more and more lately, but I know I must start letting go.

Josie is still liking hanging out with mom. She treated me to a concert a few weeks ago and it was just filled with priceless memories. We got to see Gloriana. As seen above. Yep we had the cheep seats but it made no difference. We had a blast.

Do you see a happy little girl here?


Kelli Pickler also performed. She had to do it seated because the night before she fell and hurt her ankle. A very Brianna like move if you ask me. It was still an awesome performance. I think by being forced to sit her vocals were so much better.





And then the Main concert started......











Can you tell who we went to go see?





Yep it was Taylor Swift.



The concert was one of the best I have seen.

She was so gracious and thankful. Full of entertaining. Telling sweet stories. She made us all feel like she was here just for you. She would go into the crowd and meet people. I was blown away at what an amazing performer she was, And how though the entire concert ( which was over 2 hours for her part) she would keep thanking us for being their and how it was such a treat to be performing for us.

It was an amazing trip full of laughs, music, food, and memories.

My only regret was that Brianna didn't want to come, I would have loved having her their too.

But two weeks ago she did spend the day with me, so she hasn't left me altogether yet.

Butterfly Boutique had a booth at the Walk for Autism day. Brianna came with me and it was one of the most enjoyable street fairs that I have ever done. Now that kid rocks at street shows! She gets down and will just play with any kid passing by, giving parents a chance to shop.
So no kid running off that you have to chase, and she get the child to fall in love with something so the Adult buys it! A very good combination if you ask me.

We were having a good time but the walk was about to start so all the people were lining up, so no customers. Brianna looks over at me and asks if she could go on the walk. I told her to go see what she would need to do to register, and if it was too late. It was starting in less than 5 min.

She comes skipping back saying that she could walk, you don't need to do anything to just walk and could she please go. So off she went walking and I was thinking what a cool kid I had That she would give up a free Sunday to hang with her mom working a street show, and then to go walk for Autism. I felt that she might not be pulling away too fast, and that she is still around for a bit more. She gets back from her walk dressed a bit differently.

So she joined the group walking from her old Elementary school, and made a 25.00 donation for the tee shirt. She babysits one night each week making 20.00 dollars each time. She took the money that she had earned and used it for the donation.
I felt so blessed to be this child's mother.

She was so happy to give.

So proud to say that she contributed and helped this cause.
Never asking me for the donation money.
(which I would have given her)

So we have spent time slowing down, being at home, planting a garden,
making quilts, lots of home made food, helping the elderly, our neighbors, and our community. And I am being with my girls, having separate dates each week with each of them.
So we are doing well and are happy.

Fun with out so much sun....

Monday was a holiday for the kids here, so we spent the day calmly working, from the shop and at home. We had been having real weather all day long, so about 4:30 I decided to skip the "bewithcing" hour and go for a drive. I LOVE where I live and can only say that living on the coast has kept me functional.(notice I didn't say sane?) Being at the water is where I go if I am hurt, happy, or just needing to HEAR god. I took Nat and Audrey on this drive to see the waves.

We normally have pretty peacful weather but when it is stormy, I love to go to the beach. Watching the waves be so violent just calms me like nothing else. I can see and hear God here better, I get to give all my worries to Him by sending them away on the ocean, deep breathing with the roll of the waves, me matching His Breaths. I get the overwhelming presence of God.

Yep, I am a Beach person!

So out we go to watch the waves.

The view as we start to decend to the cove whee we are going.

Some of the waves crashing on the tide pools.

Standing in the cove looking out to the cliffs.

More tide pool waves.

It is starting to get dark, and creating beautiful clouds.

So, the little kids informed me that I never have taken them there to watch the waves. Normally we go to Morro Bay, witch has wonderful look out spots too. But I was in the mood for here so off we went.

They kept running and skipping rock, having a ball of a time. After a while we drove to the top of the bluffs, and opened the windows to listen.

Me asking "do you here that?"

Them, "No what?"

"That is God talking to you."

I think they get it.

If they don't then we had a beautiful afternoon and made many memories.

Packing, teenagers, and 1 small bag.

Tonight we are packing to go on a little vacation. The first real Vacation in 5 years.

No wedding, graduation, bithday, dance competition, or pig show to use as the reason to go.

Just going to have FUN.

And fun will be had, if we can get packed with out blood shed.

We are going to Disneyland as a family Christmas present. Now we are going as a family, My girls, me, Gretchen and her two little ones. If you counted that was 6, and we have a 6 passenger car. We also need to fit into the car Nathaniel's wheel chair, which now that he received a new and bigger one takes the whole back end.

So enter the big fight of the night.... We are only taking ONE little bag. Yep. For me and my two teenage daughters I have limited it to one bag. One bag for all!!! Clothing, bathroom supplies, makeup, hair and entertainment. (you know books, crayons, notepads etc.)

Brianna is trying to convince me to let her take her computer and that she could use her computer bag to pack into. Not falling for it.

Josie is just in denial. The pile of stuff she Needs is as tall as me, but she says I am the Queen of packing and will make it all fit. I am surprised that she hasn't tried to get me to pack her guitar, saying we could all play or sing to it.

Now me, I haven't even begun to sort and pack, I have been avoiding it all, hoping the girls will wise up and follow the guidelines put before them.

Hey it is a new year, I can be optimistic.

I am hoping to get it all done tonight, so then their is no fighting tomorrow.

Will I succeed?

BTW...I get to take my computer...It is smaller!

blog design contest

So have you ever visited Gretchen's blog??? She has an ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS blog designer and I have been wanting Carla to design something spectacular for Butterfly for a while... but allass it doesn't seem to make it to the top of the priority list with the limited $$ I have. After all Butterfly needs a cute new look (check it out HERE) and I can boss my designer here around lots :)

BUT.. Carla is having a giveaway HERE and I could WIN a makeover :)

Isn't that cool????

GO check Carla out (she is an amazing believing mom to a special needs child or two) and check out her fabulous work too :)